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By Dr. Sabrina Brandon Ricks, SBR Workplace Leadership Services
The Harvard Business Review and researcher Dr. Jean Twenge contends that many Americans and individuals around the world are experiencing an epidemic of loneliness at work, at school, and in their personal lives. We live in a society where individuals increasingly remain in a personal bubble of isolation that in many cases is self-imposed. The soft skills surrounding how to build interpersonal relationships are becoming obsolete and the levels of anxiety and depression that have increased due to this state of being are at alarming rates. Something has to be done. Changes have to be made in order for us to move onto a better path for relationship building, demonstrations of love and kindness, and the simple act of humanity. Where can we start?
Social Media
There is a plethora of research available now highlighting the negative impacts of extensive social media usage. There are several social media platforms available, such as X, Snapchat, Facebook, TikTok, YouTube, Instagram, and more. When one is scrolling through what seems to be an infinite amount of material (e.g., photos, videos, comments), time is wasted that could be used to engage with another human. Hours are wasted, social comparisons are made, anxiety is induced, self-esteem is lowered, and the chance of wanting to engage in face-to-face settings is lowered. Finally, sleep is reduced because individuals are on social media throughout the night which creates irritability and frustration the next day when they may actually have face-to-face contact with someone. Again, this impacts the potential to build relationships. Decrease social media time in order to make room in your life to interact with others in a face-to-face setting.
Appreciation
Dr. Gary Chapman and Dr. Paul White introduced the concept of appreciation in the workplace. The five languages of appreciation consist of words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, tangible gifts, and physical touch. It would be wise for managers across industries to learn the appreciation needs of their employees. This can be done by having teams read The Five Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace book and completing the Motivation by Appreciation Inventory to determine which language defines each employee. When you find that there are individuals who thrive better in environments that offer quality time and acts of service, it is essential to learn the specific needs of those employees in order to avoid their feeling of loneliness at work. It is the matter of communication and care.
Intentionality
In order to combat loneliness, one must be intentional in creating environments where face-to-face interaction can occur. Additionally, one must be approachable (i.e., friendly and smiling) and willing to initiate a conversation. This sounds easy enough but if you have been locked in the world of social media and experienced a decline in the soft skills of human interactions, this could be anxiety inducing and uncomfortable to start. To address this, you can go into the office to work even if you have the option to telework. You could go to a community event, fair, or festival to engage with others. You could attend a local chamber of commerce event to meet new people.
You could think of it as networking or as human connection challenge or game for yourself. You may have to initiate the conversation with a “hello,” some talk about the weather, talk about where you each work, maybe pay a compliment, and find a place of common ground in the interaction. You could also plan a lunch, dinner, or otherwise with a known friend or family member to “catch up”. In all of these scenarios, you must approach it and the person on the receiving end with intent.
As with anything, the more you try it, the better you become. There are too many people on the planet for loneliness. There are amazing and wonderful people out there to get to know but you have to be open and go for it. Do not let one bad experience define what healthy relationship building can be like in your professional or personal life. Keep putting yourself out there and you may be pleasantly surprised to see who you may meet: a best friend, a top employee, a spouse, or a person to simply meet with for coffee or lunch from time to time.
Contact SBR Workplace Leadership Services for additional training topics related to combatting loneliness or if you need a consultant to execute leadership training or teambuilding activities for your workplace. Step out of your own way and navigate forward with confidence and intentionality to meet new people.
